Tango Thoughts

Salon Clore...

... the floor was packed for the class with a sea of eager dancers, faces old and new alike.  We started with a walk and everyone was with the music. 

The sea began to rise and fall with the music.  With elements added the challenge became apparent and what was simple became intriguing.  Then the waves waned and a new tide for the milonga rose.

An afternoon of waves and movement and music and laughter, a relaxed contentment was in the air, this was the new utililty that neither sales nor telly could not provide. 

Thank you for the sweetness, the chocolates, the words, the hugs, I'm glad you enjoyed it.  There will be more!

Tia Deby: How do I end a dance? from a Lady

A group of friends of mine from San Francisco came to visit me in my apartment in San Francisco.  They had been in Buenos Aires for about 2 weeks.  They told me when they first came, they were dancing quite a bit, but now they were not dancing that much.  They said it was happening to them in all of the milongas.

I was surprised.  They are all fairly attractive women, and they all dance well.  Well enough to be dancing a significant amount of the time.  We continued to talk about the milongas when one of the women made the comment “I give them one song and then I leave the floor.”  I was horrified.  “You do what?”  I said to her.  They all looked at me like I was some kind of idiot.  Another one of my friends patiently explained to me “I don’t want to waste my time dancing with someone who doesn’t know how to dance. So if he is not a good dancer I just leave the floor.”

I was shocked.  Who the hell did these women think they were?  In my very best Miss Christianson voice. (Miss Christianson was my 3^rd grade Home Room teacher) I told them, “Here in Buenos Aires, you need to earn the right to walk off the floor.  What you are doing is rude.  No wonder no man wants to dance with you.”  I explained to them that by walking off the floor and leaving the man standing there it was insulting.  No man wants to be left on the floor by a woman.  Everyone sees this.  Because they were doing this routinely, the men in the milongas were not inviting them.

What was the response of the women? “Hey we are just dumb tourists.”  Dumb tourists or not it is rude.  When a man invites me to dance, I have accepted his invitation.  If the man is not as good a dancer as I thought he would be, whose fault is that?   Does this give me the right to insult him and walk off the floor?  No it does not.  How many men struggled through dances with me?  Many in those first years, and they never left me on the floor. Not one of them.

There are exceptions.  I have had men who were hurting me.  Who were really bad dancers, where it was absolutely impossible to dance with them.  It was obvious to anyone watching.  In this case I very politely tell the man, I am sorry, but I really need to sit out the rest of the tanda.  I usually dance 2 of the songs.  Usually they know there is a problem.

The other exception is when you get a total jerk.  This is a guy who tries to tell you how to dance, who is completely obnoxious.  In this case, I simply tell them that I think they would be more comfortable dancing with someone of their own level.  I thank them, and leave the floor.

In my situation, people know my level of dance.  When I leave the floor, they want to know what happened.  It is not a black mark against me.  The men will continue to dance with me.  I have earned the right to leave the floor.

There is never a substitute for good manners in any situation.  Before you end that dance, think about how you might feel if you were the one who was going to be left standing in the middle of the floor. 

I always tell the women who visit me; a tanda is maybe 12 minutes of your life.  When you think of how long you are going to live, how important is that 12 minutes? 

Beso,

 

Deby

 

® Deby Novitz 2008TangoSpam all rights reserved.  No parts of this may be reproduced without permission of the author

Deby Novitz' blog can be found at
http://tangospam.typepad.com/tangospam_la_vida_con_deb/

Tia Deby: How do I buy Tango Shoes?

This is for the ladies mostly.  Because I am one.  First of all, I hate those dancer sneakers.  Those are not shoes for tango.  Those are shoes for some other dance.  You cannot dance tango in those shoes.  You need to be able to work the floor in tango and with those shoes you cannot.  Please do not give me your 25,000 excuses about how comfortable they are.  The only thing those shoes are going to do for you is give you more bad habits in your dancing.  You would not play tennis in high heels, so why would you dance tango in sneakers?  Next!

Most people do not understand how important the construction of the shoe is. They look only at the esthetic aspects.  Women want the shoe to be sexy, the heel to be high, and the shoe to be pretty.  I think they forget they have to dance in the shoe.  Men want a shoe that stands out.  That people will look at.  How often do I hear “My feet hurt?”  Why? You need shoes to dance in, not shoes for pictures.

The heel is a very important part of the shoe. Plastic or acrylic stiletto heels might be sexy but they are death for your dance.  For the ladies, they do not help your balance.  The standard covered wood heel is still the best.  It gives you stability.  The same is true for men. Look for shoes that use a wooden not a plastic heel. Plastic heels are hollow and do not give you the same stability that a wooden heel will give you.

Heel height plays a huge role in your balance and axis.  Lower is better.  Yes, darling you read that correctly.  So let’s go back and read it again.  Lower is better.  Why?  OK.  In men, tango dancers, do not wear high heels.  Those are either transvestites or folkloric dancers.  Male tango dancers should wear a low heel.

Ladies, what are you thinking wobbling in on those 9 and 10cm plastic stilts you can barely walk on?  If you can barely walk on them, whatever makes you think you can dance in them.  You are leaning all the way forward hanging on the man with your butt sticking out.  No you do not look like Geraldine.  You look ridiculous.  Do yourself a big favor and put on a pair of shoes that have a 7 or 8cm heel.  Both your feet and the men you are dancing with will thank you.

You need to be dancing in shoes where you can comfortably put your weight on your metatarsal and lean forward.  This is for both women and men.  The shoes need to support you.  Yes, they should look good.  But if the shoe does not support you, then why are you wearing them?  In my opinion spending all that money on shoes that look good but hurt your feet is not money well spent.

I suppose there are people out there, where it is more important to them to “look like tango dancers”  (whatever that means) than to actually be happily dancing tango.  I personally would rather be dancing, and without pain.

Besos,

 

Deby

® Deby Novitz 2008TangoSpam all rights reserved.  No parts of this may be reproduced without permission of the author

Deby Novitz' blog can be found at 

http://tangospam.typepad.com/tangospam_la_vida_con_deb/

Tia Deby writes for Tango Thoughts...

I first read Deby Novitz' blog about a year ago and was hooked.  Her sincere and heartwarming stories of her real life in Buenos Aires made me smile and nod my head to no end.  We've been in touch and in a wonderful gesture Deby has agreed to become our "Tia Deby" and answer any questions you might have.  To ask a question send us an email and who knows, you may get Tia Deby giving you the honest lowdown in her inimitable style. Here's more about Deby.

In December 2000 Deby Novitz made her first trip to Buenos Aires to dance tango.  She fell in love with the city, the culture, and the Porteño life style.  She made the first of 18 trips before coming to 

live permanently in 2004.  She sold everything she owned in California, gave up her computer business, and moved to Buenos Aires with her dog Roxie (recently deceased in September 2008), her computer, tango shoes, and CDs to start a new life.

In Palermo she rents two rooms in her apartment to people who come to dance tango.  She gives tours, she teaches English, she does what she can to maintain a life there.  She has appeared on television, and in the local newspapers in Buenos Aires.  In the milongas she is known as 

the "milonguera extranjera."  (the foreign milonguera) She writes the popular blog TangoSpam:Lavida Con Deby and is does not see herself ever leaving Buenos Aires.

Tango most beautiful...

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart.

Helen Keller

Think you'll need some Tango over Christmas?

A Taste of Tango is delighted to host the “Salon Clore” milonga in association with the Southbank Centre.  A matinee milonga on 26th December  in the Clore Ballroom of the Royal Festival Hall from 3-7pm.  

A relaxed and jovial milonga with the best in traditional Tango music with a touch of something new.  Salon Clore with start with a class, followed by an afternoon of music including live sets from Tango Siempre.

This is our gift to you for Christmas, entrance is free.  The only thing we ask for is a festive spirit.

3:00-4:00pm Lesson with Daniel Carlsson & Jenney Surelia
4:00-7:00pm Milonga with sets by Tango Siempre and perhaps some surprises!

Hope to see you there : ) 

View Larger Map

IMPORTANT: Daniel Carlsson & Jenney Surelia: December Sessions & Abrazos

Due to unforeseen circumstances, Aldo Velasquez is unable to be part of the December Tango Sessions, A Taste of Tango is delighted to welcome Daniel Carlsson in his place, teaching with Jenney Surelia.

Daniel will also be teaching and performing with Jenney at Abrazos on 5th December.